Why do I buy the same accessories over and over again?
3 November 2026
The endless hunt for the perfect bag, and why it’s not just us women.
This is part two of Why keep buying the same clothes? With accessories there are some extra things at play. In my experience it applies more to men than women, so good luck decluttering your partner if that’s your situation! Still, here’s the thinking.
Buying accessories such as rucksacks again and again in search of the “perfect” one is a very particular version of a familiar pattern. It isn’t just repeating a style; it’s an active quest for an ideal that keeps pulling you back to buy more. Here’s why.
1. Perfectionism and the paradox of choice
In psychologist Barry Schwartz’s terms, you’re probably a “maximiser” rather than a “satisficer”. Maximisers want the very best option and keep searching, because there’s always something better: a cleverer compartment, a lighter weight, tougher fabric, the perfect size for laptop, gym kit and lunch.
With hundreds of bags to choose from, that abundance breeds indecision and constant dissatisfaction. Even after buying one, you spot a small flaw (“the straps dig in after 20 minutes”) and the hunt starts again. It feels like optimising your life, but it often comes from perfectionism or a fear of choosing wrongly.
2. The thrill of the hunt
The biggest rush comes from searching and anticipating, not owning. Your brain releases dopamine while you read reviews, compare specs and imagine how the perfect bag will transform your commute or travels. Once it arrives, it quickly becomes normal, the excitement fades and your mind starts looking for the next upgrade. That’s how people end up with several near-identical rucksacks, each one briefly recapturing the thrill.
3. Control, competence and daily use
A rucksack is a tool you use every day, and it can feel like an extension of you:
- The perfect one promises to solve real problems: backache, disorganisation, the weather.
- In an unpredictable world (and British weather), controlling this one object gives a sense of being prepared.
- It ties into identity: “I’m the organised, practical, adventurous one with the right gear.”
So the quest feels rational and necessary, even when it’s really emotional.
4. Social safety and status
Bags are highly visible. Chasing the perfect one can be a quiet way of wanting to look capable, stylish or together without obvious luxury: reassurance that you’re presenting your best self to the world.
5. Emotional comfort and avoidance
As with clothes, a new bag can soothe anxiety, boredom or a vague sense that things aren’t quite right yet. It gives you a concrete project and a feeling of progress when other parts of life feel stuck: productive procrastination in disguise.
It’s not just us women
Men do this a lot with rucksacks and “man bags”. (My brother-in-law has more bags than me, though not as pretty!) Why? Bags are functional and personal. Unlike clothes that are washed and rotated, a daily bag is used non-stop, so its flaws irritate more. And it’s easier to justify (“it’s an investment in my back”) than another jumper.
“The biggest rush comes from the hunt, not from owning.”
The good news is that this habit often comes from positive traits: self-awareness, high standards and a love of quality. If it’s becoming a problem (a cluttered wardrobe, regret or money worries), here are some gentle ways to break the cycle:
- Set a one-in, one-out rule for bags.
- Give yourself a 48-hour cooling-off period before you buy.
- Write your “good enough” list of must-have features in advance, so you stop maximising and start satisficing.
- Channel the hunt elsewhere: repair what you have, organise it, or window-shop without buying.
If your cupboard is full of almost-perfect bags, I’d love to help you work out which ones earn their place.
Cheers,
Sophie
